Common wisdom dictates that only men have an Adam’s apple. This, however, is quite clearly incorrect.
The Adam’s apple is a protuberance in the frontal neck, a protrusion of cartilage and fat known technically as the laryngeal prominence. The etymology of the phrase is uncertain, but the term likely derives from one of the following:
- A reference to the biblical Adam, made by God during the seven days of creation. Adam was the first man to walk the earth and the male love interest and garden-slave of Eve (the first woman). When Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit (a godly metaphor for mutual masturbation), Adam got some of the prohibited apple stuck in his throat (another metaphor). This lump grew into the laryngeal prominence, which was then named after Adam and the metaphorical apple that was stuck in his neck.
- An erroneous translation of the original Latin term. In Latin, the laryngeal prominence is called pomum Adami. While pomum is quite clearly “apple,” Adami does not mean “Adam” — it means “man.” Therefore, the Latin pomum Adami means “man apple.” According to linguists, “man apple” was one of many strange expressions used by the Ancient Latinos. Incidentally, linguists and bible students believe that whoever wrote the bible probably gave Adam the name “Adam” precisely because it means “man,” which is really quite unimaginative as far as names go.
Do Both Men and Women Have an Adam’s Apple?
Biologists and doctors agree that all adult humans, apart from some freaks of nature, have an Adam’s apple. Therefore, we can safely say that both men and woman have an Adam’s apple.
Confusion arises due to the larger laryngeal prominence in the male neck and the much smaller and less prominent laryngeal prominence in the slender female neck. Men, you see, have longer vocal chords because they need to talk in a low and manly voice to attract women and scare off wolves. Women have short vocal chords because they talk like women and scream a lot.
Vocal chords, therefore, account for the size difference between the laryngeal prominence (Adam’s apple) in men and women, and therefore the prominent prominence of the laryngeal prominence in men and the non-prominent, often unseen, laryngeal prominence in women.
Prominent Female Adam’s Apples
Some adult females do have a prominent Adam’s apple. This may be due to a number of reasons, including unnaturally high levels of testosterone or frequent sword swallowing.
Lady Gaga is a good example of the prominent laryngeal prominence in women. Many people question whether Lady Gaga is a man or a woman. She is in fact — or at least in all probability — a woman. Her large Adam’s apple, however, is often used in arguments to the contrary (i.e. Lady Gaga is a man). Lady Gaga probably has a large Adam’s apple simply because she’s a high-testosterone megastar who sings too much.
