The following is an addendum to the article How to Join the Illuminati: Membership Application. Many readers of the aforementioned article are emailing StudioKnow (a website with no direct relationship to the Illuminati) because they cannot figure out how to email the Illuminati web presence (at illuminati-order.com).
This is a depressing state of affairs. If you are incapable of following the incredibly simple instructions as listed at illuminati-order.com, then you are probably not a suitable candidate for inclusion within the world’s most powerful organization. However, everyone deserves a chance.
Contact the Illuminati
Please read the following with a clear mind and with a level of concentration befitting a human being:
1. Go to the Join Us page at illuminati-order.com.
2. Beneath the Application subheading, you will find instructions.
3. Read these instructions.
4. Now, open the Illuminati Order Membership Application page.
5. As stated in the instructions, you should copy and paste the application page text into a new email (see next step).
6. You can go to the Contact page and click on Membership near the top of the page (an email form will appear) or you can simply email the Illuminati at email@example.com using your preferred email program. You do not need to encrypt anything unless you really want to. If you are struggling to send a simple email, then encryption probably isn’t for you. For general enquiries, send your emails to the Information address.
7. Paste the application form text into the email and answer all of the questions (if you are struggling, go back and read StudioKnow’s guide to the Illuminati application form as mentioned above).
7.(a). Note: if you do not want to give illuminati-order.com certain details such as your email address, then don’t send it to them. Privacy is an important issue. It’s your choice. Think about it. It’s always good to think about things. Really, it is. Seriously.
8. Good, we’re almost there.
9. Now, click SEND.
11. You may or may not receive a response.
Either way, please do not email StudioKnow. Do not send your application form to StudioKnow. We are not the Illuminati. We are a gateway to knowledge.