What does God look like?

With all the information available in today’s computer age, it is often difficult to tell fact from fiction. Luckily, a quick browse through the internet soon reveals the true facts of any matter. Books can also be used but they are not always reliable, and you have to leave the house to find books, or buy them online, and that costs money.

By cross-checking a number of online sources, therefore, the generally accepted facts about God soon become apparent.

God’s Gender

God is a man. There are very few pictures of God as a woman. If such pictures did exist they were probably banned and burned. Such destruction is understandable because God is a man and it’s wrong to lie.

God’s Race and Appearance

God has a big white beard. He looks a bit like Santa Claus but he is bigger, not as fat and does not dress in red with white trim. He prefers to wear all white, or shades of white, in a loose, flowing style. He sometimes likes to show his muscles.

God has white skin, at times very lightly tanned (but definitely not tanned enough to be considered ethnic in any possible way; God looks like a wise caucasian American). On the World Skin Tone Chart, God would be a number 14, the same color as Western Jesus.

God’s Power

God is all-powerful. To put this into perspective: the USA rules the world due to its great power, but God is even more powerful than the USA.

Interesting facts about God

God is a white male, pale or sometimes lightly tanned, very powerful, with a large beard. He lives on a cloud, or sometimes in the Sun. 

God’s Residence

Conflicting information exists as to where God lives. Most people would say that God lives in an upwards direction, maybe on a cloud or in space or on the moon or something.

Other sources say that God lives inside things. These things often include trees, colorful flowers and the souls of people. He is also sometimes said to live in the “details” – but that doesn’t make any sense.

You will often hear that God is love. That expression comes from poems and pop song lyrics that say stuff like “Love is all around us.” That’s what some people say about God when they don’t believe that He lives on a cloud. But in all likelihood, He does live on a cloud, even if it’s a space cloud somewhere in the Milky Way.

Interesting Facts About God: Capitalization

God is always written with a capital “G” because it is his name. However, when people write about gods (plural) there is no capital “G” because there are lots of them so they can’t be so important. They also have their own names like Thor, Odin and Isis.

A capital letter is also used when God is referred to as “He.” That’s because He’s important and demands a lot of respect, and if you don’t respect Him He might banish you to the depths of hell when you die, where you will burn in agony for all eternity.